1 Peter 3:9
“not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.”
It’s not too often that we learn a purpose for our calling. Peter gives one; to give a blessing and that we would inherit a blessing in response.
Genesis 1:27,28 says, “God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. God blessed them;” Look at God’s pattern. He creates and gives a blessing. It’s like He can’t help Himself. It’s the very first act he does with His new creation. He blesses. Our purpose is similar. That may be part of what it means to be created in His image, to be a blesser.
Marriage (and all relationships) is the context in which giving blessings is to be practiced. Peter talks about the marriage in which insults are traded. He says it as if it’s the natural course of a marriage. Both people wanting needs met and not trusting that they will be. We get desperate. Our frustrations lead to insults.
How does a person who is afraid of their needs not being met, become a person who can look past that to become one who seeks to meet needs (to bless). It’s a fact that needs must be met. If one is thirsty, water will be gotten. How does one set aside their needs and calmly focus on the partner? It’s because that one has learned that God meets needs. It’s as if they have learned to wait. And that filling will be overflowing.
As we walk with Christ, learning to be a giver is part of the lessons. I love the image of kids scrambling toward the pinata candy. That’s us. Through time He teaches us to see others around us as well as attempting to learn their needs. We learn this in relationships. It involves people being hurt and expressing it. All of the sudden we see their need when we were completely unaware of it prior. We begin to ask, “I wonder what other needs are there that I don’t see?”
Jesus says, “Give and it will be given unto you”. He goes on to say that the return will be much more than the original investment. The biggest blessing we get is a full heart. That God shaped craving is filled and thensome. The return usually isn’t in that instant. It also might not be of the same type. We might give of our time and he may return with strong health. We have to trust that He will amply meet our needs. This person exults in blessing others.
Can we bring up our needs to our spouses (or in other relationships). Of course. The time is rarely in the heat of trading insults. But later, spoken in a vulnerable, non accusatory way.
Lord, thank You for this purpose of being a blessor. Thank You for equipping and blessing us. Show us where we need to grow in this area.