Ephesians 6:1
“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right”.
Raising children is a wonderful thing. In my twenties I was reluctant to do so. I had a ministry mindset and put that above children. However, my wife greatly wanted them, so I recanted. Mine was a good motive for not doing so.
Many young couples do not want children for other reasons. They want to maximize time with themselves. Not the best motive. Why so? Marriage makes one others centered. Becoming a parent even more so. We are selfish individuals. When we are left to that state it’s not good for us or others.
Jesus gave the two great commandments, to love God and others. Being self focused is opposed to them. As I have walked with Christ I am far more satisfied when I’m focused on Him and others. When I am self focused I am the least happy.
God created us to love Him and others. So, that’s when we are the most rewarded. We feel good about ourselves and He rewards us with joy.
As parents our job is to keep our kids safe, teach them right from wrong, teach them to love God and to obey us and authorities. Today’s passage focuses on children obeying their parents.
Our culture doesn’t support all these values. They want kids to love the planet foremost and to be true to their own feelings next. The problem with loving the planet first is that it is against the bible. Romans 1:25 says, “They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is forever worthy of praise! Amen.” The problem with feeling first is that it is in conflict with God’s command to put Him first and to trust the order He established. “I am the LORD your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery. You shall have no other gods before Me”, (Exodus 20:2,3).
When we teach our children to obey us we are teaching biblical truth. Thus preparing them for a life in Christ. When we teach them to obey parents, we are breaking a selfishness pattern. It’s natural to want one’s way. Some in the world celebrate that. I think of Frank Sinatra’s song, “My Way”. The bible goes against that. Teaching a child to obey parents is such an example.
I referenced how some couples don’t want kids as they seek to focus on themselves. This again feeds selfishness. The way of Jesus is contrary to selfishness. Matthew 16:24 says, ‘Then Jesus told His disciples, “If anyone wants to come after Me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow Me.”‘ Denying one’s self is part of God’s way. Jesus did it Himself. He lived to please the Father and to love us and die for our sins.
We are doing our children a favor when we teach them to obey us and to deny self. The bible has much to say about discipling children. Proverbs 13:24 says, “He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him diligently.” I know some think of abuse when they hear this and some are abusive. One can be a loving, supportive parent and do this.
Disciplining children is symbolic of how God disciplines us. Hebrews 12:6 says, “For the Lord disciplines the one He loves, and He chastises every son He receives.” I Peter 4:12 expounds on that, “Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal among you, which comes upon you for your testing, as though something strange were happening to you.”
Lord, thank You for Your discipline. Help us to submit to it. Help us to train our children well.