2 Samuel 3:7
‘And Saul had a concubine whose name was Rizpah, the daughter of Aiah; and Ish-bosheth said to Abner, “Why have you gone in to my father’s concubine?”’
Ish-bosheth was king over Israel while David was king over Judah. Abner was in charge of Ish's armies. He challenged Abner with the above question. It insulted him and he quit his job and switched over to David's kingdom. Was he right to challenge him? Would he have seemed like a puppet king if he didn't? It's difficult to say. This didn't work as it caused Abner to be offended and defect to David along with an attempt to bring Israel to David.
What can be learned here? Ish may have tolerated Abner taking the concubine. Let it go. It may have stopped there. If so, Ish would have offered the necessary respect and all would have been well.
We need to tolerate others. We may have the authority and we may have the right to be firm. However, we need to give others some wiggle room. If we are too controlling, then we may lose them. We can't allow them to be abusive to others. Sometimes we need to allow them to have their messy style keep them.
It doesn't mean we never tighten the reigns. We need to be wise with how we manage. Some may have a problem with this. In reality, we do treat people differently. In the classroom, some kids have extra time due to a 504 or their iep. I can't recall students questioning this.
This takes some confidence on our part. Some will complain, "Whose really in charge?" Let them talk. There's a phrase that says, "Be the bigger person." We need to let some things roll off our backs. Most understand these practices. The petty few will always find something to complain about.
If we care what others say about us, these complaints will haunt us. Proverbs 29:25 says, "The fear of man is a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is set securely on high." We need to listen to God, not the crowd. It will always hurt to hear others criticize us, but as we fear God, those comments are less influential. In time it becomes muscle memory to shrug off those comments.
The second part of the proverbs passage says that "we will be set securely on high." The Lord rewards us for listening to Him. God is so loving with us. He is simply amazing. What a blessing to follow Him. Proverbs 4:18 says, "The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, shining brighter and brighter until midday." As we follow Him, He makes our lives better and better.
We will never be perfect and the sanctification process never stops while here on earth. God brings things to mind that need adjustment. We give those to Him. "Lord help me with this." That's what He wants to hear. He will help with the degree that we were looking for. There are different degrees of help. A full restoration is one extreme, to get it running is the other. We've got many stages in between.
Our consciences can always haunt us. That doesn't mean that's God. I John 3:20 says, "Even if our hearts condemn us, God is greater than our hearts, and He knows all things." We pray when that happens. "God is that You? Give me wisdom to acquiesce or to ignore this guilt." He honors that.
Today's passage deals with the northern king of Israel and him disciplining the commander of his army. It backfired. This led us to discuss how to work with others. We learned that it's not a one size fits all. We also learned that it's something that we trust God with. He honors that. Lord, thank You for all You do for us.