Galatians 4:20
“how I wish I could be with you now and change my tone, because I am perplexed about you!”
In The New Living Translation the last part of the verse says, "at this distance I don't know how else to help you." Paul's frustrated. He's worried about them. His Galatian sheep have been hijacked and are in the process of falling away. He wishes he were present. This letter and his disapproving tone is all he knows to do.
On a side note, the Lord used this situation for the purpose of Paul writing this letter. The Lord wanted it in scripture. The church has benefited greatly by this it. Once again the Lord uses all types of situations to positive purposes.
Paul is stuck in what further he can do. He has done everything he knows to do. He wishes he could do more, but he's at a loss. We get in that situation as well. We've done all we know to do. There isn't a resolution and we've run out of ideas.
There comes a point where we are done contributing. Sometimes it's distance that limits us. There are several types of limits. There comes a point where the other individual needs to act. It would be inappropriate for us to continue.
This is personal responsibility. This makes me think of Hebrews 5:12, "For though by this time you ought to be teachers, you have need again for someone to teach you the elementary principles of the oracles of God, and you have come to need milk and not solid food." Just as a child matures and learns to take care of themselves, this has a spiritual parallel. As believers we need to feed ourselves and respond to the Lord in growth. The individual has to do this themselves. We can pray for them and commit them to God, but they need to be responsible for their growth.
There comes a point where we are done contributing. Our last duty is to pray for them. This may be where Paul is at. He shared the letter. There couldn't have been a better response. He is to pray for them. He can check in or have travelers provide an update or even another letter, but prayer is where he's at.
Some can go to bad places at this point. They can try to do things that are the responsibility of the individual. This is the start of a codependent relationship. It's like a parent doing for a child what the child should learn to do on their own. The parent is stunting the child's growth and development. When grown and the parent is out of the picture, the person seeks a mate who will continue the codependent relationship.
The Lord seeks to help all of us. He draws all of us to Him (John 12:32). However, there's a point where people need to do for themselves. God won't take this away from them. I think of the parable of the soils. Only one of them had the heart state that allowed growth. The other three types weren't able to sustain life. God could have intervened and calmed the anxiety or chased away the devil to allow the seed to grow. That would have gone too far. At some point the individual has to see value in maintaining healthy conditions themselves.
Paul shares his frustration, he doesn't know what else he could do. He may have been done. Committing this to God and praying for them may have been it.
Lord, give us wisdom to know how much to help. Let us know if we are going too far and taking that person's responsibility. Give us peace to rest in the fact that we've done enough.