Hebrews 9:9 “… Accordingly both gifts and sacrifices are offered which cannot make the worshipper clean in conscience.”
While I was never part of the Old Testament system, I lived outside of the New Testament system for 18 years. I went to church, but there was no connection with God. I lived in a way that wasn’t honoring to Him. When I came to Christ in July of 1979 (made him Lord and Savior of my life), I experienced forgiveness. I was very excited and called all of my friends. They were happy for me, but didn’t quite understand. I met a seminary student at work (The Treasury automotive department) named Gordon Slyter. We would meet weekly for bible study. While I still attended the same church, that small bible study is were I learned the basics of the bible and had a much needed christian mentor. Before my newfound faith, I had done several stupid things which damaged some of my friendships. So, I was not happy about my social situation. I wouldn’t say I was depressed, but I had experienced about six months of sadness because of poor connections. Another area of my life that was limited was my sleep. I didn’t get much of it and I would wake up easily. However, this changed after experiencing forgiveness. I haven’t really thought of why, but I suppose it had to do with the above scripture, I was made clean in conscience. This doesn’t mean I don’t wrestle with guilt on occasion, but it was something deeper. I was forgiven. Much like, if I had dissappointed someone I respected. If they truly forgave and embraced me in the original way, it would be liberating. It was this incredible peace. While I wasn’t aware that I was in a bad place with God, I certainly felt cleansed. It wasn’t immediate. I felt different as the weeks went by. I still have problems, but being reconciled to God has fixed the biggest broken relationship that one can have. I have since stumbled on Proverbs 3:24, “… and their sleep will be sweet.” Sleeping is now satisfying instead of haunting. Thank You, Lord, for Your forgiveness.